We have an extra visitor at our house. He has been here for awhile now. I just don't like to talk to him. And that is okay. That is my right. But sometimes we do talk about him. Sometimes I am the only one talking. Once in awhile Richard talks about him. But usually we all try to ignore him. And hope that he just goes away and leaves us alone. He's not part of our crowd.
I feel him watching from the corner of the room. I see him standing there in the shadows. Sometimes I feel the cool breeze as he walks by. And I shiver. I think I hear him chuckle. Go Away, I want to scream. We don't want you here. We are not ready. You are not part of our crowd.
So he goes back to the other side of the wall. But I still feel his eyes watching. He's waiting. He knows that the day will come when I can't ignore him any longer. He knows exactly when he will become part of the crowd.
Our Hospice Nurse very carefully avoids mentioning anything about him when she visits. But I know that she knows he is here. Sometimes I think the grand kids know he's living with us as well. I watch their reactions and I can see that they feel his presence. We didn't ask him to stay with us. He came into our house un-invited. I don't think we can ask him to leave. I don't want to make him mad. I don't want to stir him up.
I am afraid. The time for his visit to end will never be the 'right time.' I will never be ready to send this visitor out the door. I want him to stay.I just don't want him to crowd me. He needs to stay in the shadows. In the background. Don't speak to me. Don't walk close.
We'll never be ready for this visitor we call DEATH. We won't welcome him into our crowd.
Join us in writing. Without over-thinking. Straight from your heart. And then go read and give encouragement to all those who join in Five Minute Friday.