Monday, April 10, 2017

Easter Week's Life List


Today, as I gaze out my window, I see a beautiful spring day. A promise of better days ahead. The sun is shining, it is a cool 58*, a slight breeze is blowing from the south. Warmer days are coming!


As I ponder this past week I am once again overcome with grief. Losing my brother has had a huge impact on me (and all the family). And it has brought the loss of Richard back front and center.  It is so hard! I try to find the positive. But right now I just can't. My brother suffered both physically and mentally for many years of his life. He was in constant pain. I guess that is the positive, right now, he is no longer in pain. The pain right now is with his family who are going to miss him so much. Sometimes grief is almost un-bearable! 


I don't like the lessons I am learning right now. I'm having to struggle hard to see the reasons and look through the tears and the pain to find the sunshine again

What I am creating...

I changed a few things around and made my mantle transform from spring to Easter. It is all I have the energy for right now!


I have spent very little time reading since last week so I am still on the same books as last week. 


Haven't spent anytime watching much on TV either.


As I type this, General Hospital is playing in the background.


My brother's shirt from his Army days
His Viet Nam Veteran's hat
This hung at the cemetery from the corner
of the canopy

My brother Fred
So handsome!

The balloons we released for Fred

A Snap Chat from Darian on Saturday

Harley's Facebook post for me
on my Birthday

WHAT pleased me this week....

Just as we were pulling out of the driveway on Saturday, to take Harley to work, her phone alerted her she had a Snap Chat. The above picture from Darian was on her phone. We got to spend 5 glorious minutes texting him and sending pictures back and forth. It was the best Birthday present this old granny could have asked for. And the next best was the post Harley put on her Facebook. We also were blessed with Justin and Paige on Sunday. Justin cooked our meal (his famous cream cheese hamburgers with all the trimmings) and a layered Chocolate Cherry birthday cake that was 'to die for'. I had a very good birthday!


Monday...Leftovers from the birthday dinner

Tuesday...Chicken pot pies

Wednesday..Harley will eat at church

Thursday...Hamburger Steaks with mashed taters


Saturday...No weekend meals planned of yet!!


A peek into my week...

Harley is only working one day this week. I need to do some laundry. I need to take her prom dress to the dry cleaners! I need to get a Clicklist ready and then pick up groceries. I need to get back to working on 'the surprise'. I need to get ready for my brother Chuck who is coming in May. And we need to plan our trip to Georgia for June. Lots to do!! 

A final thought...

My favorite Bible verse for this week:
(A Psalm of David.) The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want.
2He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.
3He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.
4Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.
5Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.
6Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the LORD for ever


  1. What a bittersweet week! Not that I'm an expert (by any means), but please, don't struggle too hard, too long ... honor your grief, in your own way.

    1. Thanks Myra. That is what I am trying to do. Just get through it right now!

  2. I want to know about those cream cheese burgers; they sound delicious! Sounded like you had a nice birthday, so sorry though what should have been a fun birthday week began with the sadness of your brother's passing. Good that you were able to talk with Darian; he looks cute with his shaved head! Grief is a hard thing; just "go with the flow of it" and allow yourself what you need to do to grieve your brother as well as to continue grieving Richard. I too like Psalm 23!


    1. He uses a variety of seasonings and then puts cream cheese in the middle and grills the burgers. Very, very yumy!

  3. Sorry to hear of the loss of your brother. Praying for you and your family! Hugs

  4. Understandable that things fell by the wayside this week. Be good to yourself. Glad your birthday went well.

    1. Hopefully I can get back on track. As the week went along I started to suffer with a flare-up of gout in my foot and can barely walk.

  5. I am glad you got to talk with Darian, and what a nice birthday wish from Harley!
    Everyone grieves differently, there is no right or wrong. Be good to yourself! :)

  6. Hi Paula - lovely post despite the sadness - happy memories and then Darian just catching you both - that was excellent timing ... just wonderful and the FB wonder wishes from Harley - delightful ... congratulations and be at peace ... cheers Hilary

    1. Most of the time she is a good kid! Thank you Hilary

  7. I think that is a good quote to live by- it's easy to fall into the trap of being bitter. Keep smiling, Paula.

  8. It is never easy loosing the ones we love. The bright side of things is that yes, they no longer suffer. With Easter coming we're reminded that if we believe there is life after death. We miss those gone but know that they now have it much better than we could imagine. Happy belated Birthday ! Sounds like you had a wonderful day. I'm not doing Easter dinner here, but will take some mac salad, baked beans and deviled eggs to the dinners I'm attending. Having a large family always means lots of good food! Hope you have a wonderful week ahead!

    1. Thank you Ma! I hope your week and Easter are good too!

  9. One day at a time sweet friend! One of my dads best friends passed away on Friday and so it brought back thoughts of losing and missing dad to the front . I'm not able to go to funeral tomorrow in Austin because i've missed too much work already with my surgery, mom visit, etc.
    I'm so glad you had a good birthday! Cream cheese burgers and cherry chocolate cake would cheer anyone up. Seeing Darian is such a bonus. I know that made you happy. Sending hugs!

  10. Happy Birthday! Your family did well with your son's cream cheese burger (new to me but sounds tasty), fun texts from your grandson and a loving tribute from your grand daughter. I am sorry for the loss of your brother. He sounds like he was loved by his family.

  11. Sounds like a beautiful funeral, Paula. As someone else said, a rather bittersweet week - farewell to your brother and happy birthday to you. Different kinds of celebrations for your two lives. Glad you got the chance to 'chat' with Darian and Harley's Facebook post was too sweet <3 Wishing you many blessings for the coming year.

  12. Hi Paula,
    Happy Belated Birthday! Sounds like you had a wonderful celebration with your loves. I must say: I hope you'll share Justin's cream cheese hamburger recipe! It absolutely has to be yummy!

    I'm so sorry that the grief is still so present for you. It is truly one of life's hardest lessons.
    Thank you for sharing Fred's uniform shirt and that wonderful photo of him. He was indeed very handsome!

    Psalm 23 is my favorite psalm. I actually took a 6-week class years ago that dissected each sentence of the psalm. What an enrichment to explore the meaning behind it all. I hadn't thought about that class for a long time so thank you for spotlighting Psalm 23.

    Happy Easter to you and yours.

    Michele at Angels Bark

  13. Grieving is hard.

    Glad you had a nice birthday.

  14. What a gift to have that short time of texting with Darian! And Harley's message is such a beautiful gift. I like the quote you shared. Great reminder for those for when life wants to make us rough around the edges. Isn't that psalm so lovely? It's the favorite of many folks and choral composers. Very touching to see the way Fred's military service was honored by displaying his shirt and hat. Stopping by to wish you a happy Easter. Looks like yoU have a lot on your calendar to look forward to. Enjoy!

    1. I have a lot of my calendar for sure! Happy Easter to you as well!

  15. I keep you in my thoughts and prayers, always. Sending hugs.

  16. Losing a sibling is sooooo hard. Hugs to you my friend. I am so happy you had a good birthday celebration. Love you.


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