Sunday, April 26, 2015

Lessons about Worrying!


 
When I was growing up, hanging in our house, was a small wooden plaque called The Irishman's Philosophy. I read it so many times that I knew it by heart. It made a lot of sense to me at the time. At the time, when I had nothing to worry about, anyway.

And then along came the adult years. You all know the ones I mean. When we have things to worry about. Like will there be enough money for all the bills and for the food we need? Will the kids stay healthy? What if they don't? What if one of them dies? What happens if I lose my job? Or my husband loses his job? Or if he cheats on me? Or gambles and loses all of our money? Or if I divorce him?  What happens if my baby dies? How will we afford to bury her? Will I want to have another baby? What happens if there just isn't enough money? What happens if I can't find another job that will allow me to raise my kids? What if I go to school? What if I flunk out? Or what happens if I don't get accepted into nursing school? What will people think? What happens if my kids fail? What happens when they get mixed up in drugs? Or have to go to jail? Or have messed up marriages of their own? What happens if they pick dangerous careers? Ones where criminals are always trying to beat them at their game? What happens if my son can't take care of his kids? Will I be able to? What happens when my husband gets sick? Why does he cough like that? Why has his color changed? Is he dying? Will I be able to make it on my own after he is gone? How will I be able to afford to live? What is going on with the grandson? Does he make good choices? What about the granddaughter? Does she have good friends? Will they be okay? What if they don't have enough to eat? What happens if the genetics of addiction wins out? Can you see how my mind goes on and on and on? Why do I worry? How do I stop?

From Pinterest
Do you see what I mean? It's about worrying. We all do it. I can't tell you how many times, late at night, when my teenage boys were late coming home, I planned their funerals. I know it sounds bad. But I did. I worried about them. I worry about them still and they are fully gown adults. I worry about the decisions they make. I worry about the chosen careers and the safety on the streets. I worry if they are happy. I worry if they are doing okay. I worry if they are worrying. I worry about EVERYTHING. And I am not good at giving advice about not worrying. So I won't. Because it is not a lesson that I have yet learned. I know how to worry. I just don't know how to stop.


How about you? Are you a worrier? Do you know how to stop? Is it just a part of life?

Come back later for a chance to win a nice prize when I give my very first, ever product review. I promise you it will be worth paying me a second visit!! Stay tuned

21 comments:

  1. I hate to admit it, but reading this I think I've met my match! Like my mother and grand before me, I'm a champion worrier. Love the song, but I never seemed to have grasped the 'let it be' philosophy. I don't think your planning your boys' funerals sounds bad at all. As a youngster, I used to get so distraught if my parents were late coming home; I'd start making mental lists of things needing taken care of. Some folks talk about packing parachutes. Me, I've always a contingency plan.

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    1. I think we are sisters Myra! Worrying is just what I do. It drives my family crazy. I have had people tell me to "give it to God". Well that is easier said than done. I give it to HIM and then in 5 minutes I take it back. Guess it is just part of who I am!

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  2. I am such a worrier, Paula, I had to laugh about planning your sons' funerals because I did the same thing. I would like awake at night and just wait for the phone to ring, thinking it was the morgue or the hospital or the jail. I still do that to sometimes even though my son has somewhat of his life together. I give to God and then I take it back from God. I "blame" my mom because she was a worrier, always worried about money, etc., though every single need of ours was met. I wouldn't wish worrying on anyone.

    betty

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    1. I am finding that there are many of us women who are worriers. My mom was a worrier too Betty. Maybe it is a genetic link!

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  3. Hi Paula - thank goodness I am not ... and in that I realise I am lucky. This is a great read ... and shows me I need to be so grateful for so much .. cheers Hilary

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    1. Yes, Hilary you are very, very fortunate!

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  4. Oh Goodness YES I am a worrier!! I should wear a crown for Queen of Worry. My husband is so good for me because he can tell when my mind is spinning like crazy and I'm worrying over everything. I have a problem of taking on other peoples woes too. A friend of mine called me one Saturday because she didn't get the promotion she applied for. She got in an argument with her supervisor and was worried so then I became worried for her. My boyfriend at the time got furious because I allowed her problems to affect my day. I try not to let that happen as much now.

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    1. I know exactly what you mean Holli. My husband was so calm and rarely ever worried about anything. He helped me so much But now I just worry and worry and worry! And I tend to take on other people's problems as well.

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  5. My mom is a tremendous worrier. I am by nature more of a type B person, so I'm not a champion like she is. Still, I know what you mean about pre-planning the funerals. Your husband or your kids are late getting back from somewhere and your mind goes 'there'. It must be one of those realities of being human. And I think God knew that, and that's why He wants us to dwell on those thoughts that are good, pure, admirable, etc. When I worry, I remind myself of that, also that worrying doesn't add one jot to our lives and that we are to cast all our cares on Him. But by no means have I 'arrived.'

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  6. Why worry? Just a complete and total waste of time.

    Stephen Tremp
    A to Z Co-host
    W is for Window and White Noise

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    1. If only it were that easy Stephen Tremp. If only!!

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  7. Worry is not good. I try never to do it. It is what it is...

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    1. Yes, it is! I wish that I could accept that

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  8. You have to let go. Not that I know how this works, for I'm still working on it, but you have to let go of what you can't control. And pretend that only good things will happen.

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    1. I am not very good at pretending Liz

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  9. My grandmother had a copy of this Philosophy when I was growing up. I tried to remember it during my life. But wow, can you win an award for your worrying. I worry,but try not to stress about it. Stress has always been my issue.

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    1. This is one award I wish I didn't win.

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  10. Do you know what the most frequently repeated command is in the Bible? Worry not!! The Father always knows what is on our minds and in our hearts before we even open our mouths to pray. Our Lord and Savior walked in flesh upon this earth and knows every nuance of emotion and trouble we face. And when we are too stressed or tired to know how to pray, the Holy Spirit voices our prayers for us! How awesome is that?!?

    I adore the quote you posted! I'm going to steal that.

    ~ The end is in sight!!! ~
    Visit me at: Life & Faith in Caneyhead
    I am Ensign B of Tremps' Troops
    with the A to Z Challenge

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    1. Thank you Barbara. I needed that little boost!

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  11. Oh heck I am a worrier. My mom used to say I worry about things 5 years in advance. My piano teacher said the same. I don't even realize I am doing it since it is a part of who I am. I think of it as being prepared. I can do my best to calm the worry and talk it through since I need to talk it through but I can not change who I am. All I can do is soften the rough edges

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