Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Finish This-Week 36

I like to write. I love to read. I am blessed and happy that I can both read and write. Okay, I know that sounds hokie, but that is who I am. I used to do a little gig on Wednesday that is known as Finish This. The last time I participated was here. So much has happened at our house since then. I am now in, what I hope to be, the final last big changes of my life. So let's get with it and answer this weeks prompts. Then you can go one over to Nicole's Blog at Three 31 and join in the fun. It's good writing practice.




Prompt for WEEK 36 — September 10

I am serious about grieving! Or maybe what I really mean is mourning. I have heard more about grief in the past 7 weeks than I have heard in my entire life. Lots of well-meaning friends and relatives have advice. Or suggestions. Or they are grieving/mourining in their own way. Well, I am going to do it MY WAY! I always have. I loved and lived with this man for almost 36 years. I am not going to get over it in a few weeks, a few months, or maybe even a few years. I will miss him everyday for the rest of my life. Maybe someday it won't be as painful, as it is today, but it will be what it is. Did you know that grief is quite common, especially to women. Three out of four women will outlive their spouse. And the average age of becoming a widow is 56! Shocking facts. More than half of all women living in the United States today will become a widow by the age of 65. And almost 4% of all kids in the United States will lose one of their parents by the age of 15. With all that being said, I am serious about grieving! I plan to do it until I don't need to do it anymore.


I am most relaxed when I am around people I know and in a place that I am comfortable. That probably means: at home with my family. I am not a person who likes parties, crowds, eating out (crazy, huh) staying at other people's houses, or being with a bunch of strangers. I will do all of those things, if I have to. But I am most relaxed at home.


There’s no place like home! I'll bet you saw that coming, didn't you. In past years I have always been excited to go on vacations. We would plan, pack, be excited and enjoy every moment of our time away from home. But the trip home was what I always most looked forward to. I love being home. Where I am most relaxed.


I hope you will participate in Finish This. Or just answer these prompts in the comment section of my blog. I am interested in what you have to say.

9 comments:

  1. I am sorry for your loss, Paula... :( I agree that everyone should grieve in their own way. It just seems right. :)

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  2. Welcome, Paula, and thank you for sharing with us! I'm sorry for your loss and I think your thoughts on grief and mourning are spot-on. Our souls need time to heal and there is no time table. Bless you for your honesty, authenticity, and bravery. Also, you are just like my husband: no crowds, no parties, no strangers, and no eating out. I love how we're all so different in our own ways!!!!!!

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    1. Thank you Nicole for all your kind words. It is a good thing we are not all alike. What a boring world this would be. My husband was a very out-going guy. So we balanced each other.

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  3. It seems like you know how to allow yourself to grieve and how to cope with the pain. The statistics of wives outliving the husbands is a bit dreary. I joke with Mr. Sexy that I'll be the one to go first. But who knows...Keep on writing and doing what you love!

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    1. I don't know that I know how to grieve. But I am doing it!!

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  4. We were just talking about life expectancy at dinner and how men tend to die younger than women, so I told son to find a girl a few years older than him (his current girlfriend is 5 years older than him). Not making light of a serious subject, though.

    I think we tend to say something that we are thinking might be helping someone who is grieving because it saddens us to see them grieving and we just want them to feel better, but we do know they have to go through the grieving process in their own way, their own timing, etc.

    This is a cute meme; might have to do it sometime.

    betty

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    1. I like it...it is easy to follow the prompts

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  5. Take all the time you need. We are horrible at griefwork and "helping" others grieve. I was widowed at 33 and am finally doing the work. A great friend and the Grief Recovery Handbook has been helpful. I will continue counseling and being alone and crying as I see fit. Rooting for you!

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I love to hear what you might think. Leave me a comment. I guarantee though that I will delete your comment if you are just here to cause trouble. So tread lightly!