Wednesday, August 20, 2014

I'm a Planner


I have always been a 'planner'. I like a set schedule and I want everyone to stick to it. I hate being late. I am always the 'early one.' I plan dinner for tomorrow, today. This past couple of years I have been planning my meals for a week in advance. Then I plan my grocery shopping and life is so much smoother. 

However, life doesn't always go according to my plan. And it creates a lot of anxiety. Three years ago, when Richard had a stroke, all of my best-laid plans went to hell. I had to quit working, so that he would have someone home with him all the time. This created another kind of planning that I was not at all used to doing. Budgeting. And I hated it. Richard had always done this. Also, I had to become the caretaker of the house. And Richard had always done that. So I had to become a better planner.

I am a list maker. And I use my calendar. Without my calendar I would be lost. I have a calendar on the computer, on my phone, and a paper calendar. And I keep them, all 3, set up with our schedules. Two teenagers can create a lot of schedule planning. 

Since I knew that Richard's death was 'coming', I had plans for it. I wrote his obituary early, had the telephone lists ready for who needed to be called and in what order, things lined up to take to the mortuary with us for that 'horrible meeting' that takes place when you are your most vulnerable. I was ready! The only thing not planned was my reactions. And you can't plan for emotions, I guess.

If you would like to share how you plan with us then go visit my friend Lisa at My Sweet Peanut and join her One Word Wednesday link-up.

10 comments:

  1. wow! I admire that kind of planning...especially the part planning for Richard's passing. So smart...too bad you can't plan for emotions! I used to be a 3 calendar girl...but I let the paper one go last year. I have it all on my phone (we use that Cozy calendar that you can share with a group) and a big dry-erase calendar that my daughter makes beautiful for each month with all our activities...it's a life-saver. I have never gotten the hang of planning meals...and I want to...we used to have pizza night on Fridays, but that's about it. And we have leftover lunch at least one day a week...it's a hodge-podge to clean out the fridge so I can go to the grocery! Someday you're Meal-Planning Monday is going to inspire me....someday....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I used to use the cozi calendar too. I can't remember why I stopped. You really should give meal-planning a try. It has saved me more than once!.

      Delete
  2. There is no way I can understand the grief that you feel. I imagine it to be as all the wind gone from your sails and you are just standing stagnant right now. Eventually a breeze will come and move you a bit, and then a bit more, and then a little bit more until it grabs your sails and starts moving smoothly with only occasional turbulence. It takes time and it has been such a small amount of time for you thus far.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That's what I am hoping for Wendy....just small little steps. And yes it hasn't been very long

      Delete
  3. I think you are a great planner, Paula; I would imagine it helps things run more smoothly. I know it might sound morbid to plan upon the events around someone's death, but you were wise to write his obituary beforehand. I know in moments of grief afterwards people leave out key things they wish they had remembered when they go back and read it later.

    betty

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. or people make huge, costly mistakes they later regret!

      Delete
  4. I've been a compulsive planner/list maker all my life. There's a certain comfort to be found, I suppose; and it's a comfort knowing I'm in 'good company.'
    It's been a bit of a challenge, trying to conform my 'come hither or may' hubby. Just the same, I only now realized ... for all my carefully-laid resolutions, we've no end-of-life directives, etc. in place. Not a little omission.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I agree, you can't always plan for the emotions. Sometimes they just hit and it's like, "what the...." This was NOT what I had planned for this moment. :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That is how the past 5 weeks have been for me...and it is really, really upsetting

      Delete

I love to hear what you might think. Leave me a comment. I guarantee though that I will delete your comment if you are just here to cause trouble. So tread lightly!