Thursday, August 14, 2014

How Do We Tell...

It is time for Five Minute Friday at Heading Home. This week the prompt is tell: Write for five minutes and link up with the others and give love and encouragement to the person who posts before you...That is what it's all about.

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Even though we knew it was coming, I didn't know how I was going to tell people. How can you say the words he's gone. He died. He's dead. It is over. Who do we tell? And how do we tell it? I sat next to his bed and held his hand and told him over and over how much I loved him. And now I have to tell the world that he is gone. That he doesn't any longer exist. Justin was with me...thank God...so I wouldn't have to tell him. But there were so many to tell. The kids were away at camp. How do we tell them. Papa is gone. Papa has left us. Papa is with Jesus now. Papa died. I struggled with the words. What to say. In the end it wasn't me who told them. When their Aunt walked into the camp, they knew. They knew what she had come to tell. It wasn't unexpected. There wasn't anything to tell. When I called my big brother, there was nothing to tell. We usually text each other. The fact that his phone rang is all that he needed. That was my way of telling him. Telling people that someone they love has died is one of the hardest messages you will ever have to tell. Even when you think you are ready. Even when you believe the person is in a better place. When you believe they are wrapped in the arms of the Lord. It is still hard to tell. I don't want to tell anymore....

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18 comments:

  1. May comfort overwhelm you.

    Grieving hurts. This I know.

    Blessings ...

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    1. Thank you Linda. Yes, grieving hurts. Much more than I imagined it would

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  2. Paula- humbled by your heartfelt message- stopping by via FMF.

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  3. God's comforts in your loss, milady. This is a hard telling, to be sure. But, the best part of this story is your loved one is with Jesus - and you will see him again. THEN, there will be new stories to tell . . . with great joy.
    Joy!
    Kathy

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    1. Thank you Kathryn. I hope that it is true!

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  4. Sending you a big hug today! I am sorry for your loss.

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  5. I am so glad that you have your writing as an outlet for your feelings. Before I blogged, I still wrote....otherwise all those feelings would explode within me.

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    1. Me too Wendy! I have pages and pages filled. I like blogging better because I get feedback from my friends

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  6. Paula, It is a strange feeling of who to tell, how to tell, when to tell, etc. I hadn't put everything together, so I didn't realize the kids were at camp. This was God's timing, as everything is. I hope you are doing okay. You are in my thoughts often.

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    1. Yes, they were at camp. Thankfully it was only about 50 miles away so we were able to bring them home before Richard was taken to the mortuary. I think that is important for them to say their final good-bye. Although they had gotten to every time they left the house they told him good-bye like it was the final time

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  7. This is such a wonderful post. You see it all the time in movies and hear it other's stories about how the loved ones just "know". That's God in those details. He knew you needed them to know so you wouldn't have to say it. The phone ringing vs. texting...it's like the old telegrams during wartime, isn't it? We break from our habit out of respect for our loved one and the person on the other end of the message...so amazing. Keep writing it out my friend. Thinking of you!

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    1. Thanks Lisa. And that is so true about the telegrams....they seldom brought GOOD news

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  8. What a tender, poignant post. I stopped by from Five Minute Friday. I am so sorry for your loss. May God hold you closely.

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